It’s My Birthday! Wisdom, Advice & Life Lessons From The Past 25 Years
Okay guys, so it’s official.
It’s my birthday today.
I am now twenty-five.
You may remember in this post I kind of talked about how I’ve had mixed feelings in the lead up to this years birthday. I just haven’t felt like I’m ready to be twenty-five, but it’s too late for that now, isn’t it?
Looking at the entire situation in a positive light, twenty-five is a major achievement. It really is.
So, to distract myself from counting the wrinkles on my face, I’m going to share some advice, wisdom and life lessons that I’ve learnt from the past quarter of a century of being alive.
While I don’t know much, I do think that this advice may help some of you out there who are struggling with jobs, friendships, relationships and your sense of self.
Advice, Wisdom & Life Lessons From A 25 Year Old.
1. You can’t change people.
Too often in life have I tried to convince myself that people can change. And I’m not saying they can’t – I’m saying that they cannot and will not change unless it is something they themselves want to do.
I have been in so many situations where I’ve stuck by a friend, family member, or even a guy I was seeing in the hopes that they would change overnight and miraculously all of our problems would disappear. It doesn’t happen, and nine times out of ten it is you that ends up disappointed. Don’t waste your time on those people – it’s soul destroying.
2. Concealer is your BFF.
On a lighter note, concealer can change the world.
I’m being serious! I use it to cover spots, dark circles and uneven skin, but I also use it to change the shape of my face. Something else I like to do is use it on days when I’m at home with no makeup on, wearing PJs and feeling like utter shit about myself.
Whether that’s the result of the flu, a migraine or a mental health breakdown, just a few dabs of concealer in the right places can change your entire perspective on how you look and feel about yourself. It doesn’t fix things, obviously, but it does make a great deal of difference. I have a full tube on me at all times – this one is my favourite right now.
3. You don’t have to apologise.
Admittedly, this is something I’m still learning, but it’s become ever apparent to me that women apologise a-fucking-lot. Too much, even. For things that don’t warrant an apology.
The other day a man walked past me in a shopping centre and almost knocked me clean over. So what did I do? I apologised for being in his way, while he continued to walk on – not even acknowledging the apology – let alone the fact that he rammed into me.
The lesson here is, stop apologising for things that don’t warrant it. It makes you look passive and kills your soul one frantic ‘sorry!’ at a time.
4. You can’t disguise poor sleep.
Makeup can often cover it for a few days, don’t get me wrong, but after a while your neurological system starts to shut down and shit gets real weird.
Don’t skimp on sleep. It’s as simple as that.
And if you’re suffering with insomnia – get help. It’s not healthy and it’s doing so much more harm to your body than you realise.
5. Fear is a four letter word.
Sure, I’m terrified of heights and deep water, and I do think that I would have a heart attack if I ever tried to skydive, but I was also terrified of starting a blog, taking pictures, and sharing it with the world.
I was scared of what my friends would think – would they judge me? Is writing online self-indulgent? Am I neurotic?
I mean, it’s possible the answer to all three is yes, but if I would have let the fear of creating scare me off, then I wouldn’t be here today sharing this post with you all – would I?
6. Write everything down.
That’s what the notes app in your phone is for!
I swear, if I’d starting writing my ideas down when I was sixteen, I would have written ten bestseller novels by now. I have the memory of a goldfish and so writing things down has helped me remember everything – even if I don’t need it right now.
I have an entire contemporary fiction novel planned out in my notes app for whenever I’m ready to write it… and the idea for it came to me at midnight on a Wednesday after I had a dream about it.
See? I wouldn’t remember any of this if I didn’t write it down.
Birthdays, recipes and important events are also fab to record in your notes… just saying.
7. Spend time with your grandparents.
I’m sure I don’t even need to expand on this.
I treasure my grandparents and soak up every second with them whenever I go home.
My nan and I also text regularly about my tomato plants and my cats and the weather. It’s just something we do and I always look forward to getting her replies. I know that it makes her day to have regular contact with her grandchildren as well.
It’s just so so important.
8. The shit that goes down in high school does not define you.
…but it’s okay to feel like it might. I had a pretty tough last year of high school and was bullied quite a bit, and at the time I honestly couldn’t see a way out.
It got so bad that I had a panic attack after English class one day and collapsed on the ground because I couldn’t breathe… It felt like everything that happened when I was seventeen would follow me around forever and I would never be able to get past the harassment, but I did, and you can too.
It doesn’t last forever, and it doesn’t reflect upon you at all later in life. Focus on doing well and you’ll get through.
9. Cut your hair.
Or dye it. Or shave it all off.
There’s nothing more liberating than realising that it’s just hair and it will grow back.
Play around with your look! Do whatever you need to do to make yourself comfortable and happy within your skin. It is your head, after all.
10. What other people think of you is none of your business.
So don’t let a fear of others opinions and judgements change who you are as a person or how you live your life. You’ve got way too much potential to allow that.
11. And finally… the term ‘bad boy’ is just a glorified way of saying a guy is a total asshole.
Steer clear of ‘bad boys’! They’re the worst.
And for those of you who got through all of that, here’s a picture of 7? 8? 9? year old me, dressed up for the Jacaranda carnival in my hometown. Notice the lavender tinged hair and Spice Girl shoes?
I mean, isn’t it obvious? I’ve always been a total badass [with a penchant for attracting mosquito bites]!
I hope you all gained some knowledge from this post – I always think it’s so fascinating to see what people have learnt from their lives so far. Everyone is so different and I think these posts really go to show that everyone experiences their childhood, teenage years and adulthood so differently. If you were to give me one piece of advice from your lifetime – what would it be?
Thanks for all of your birthday love, guys. You make me so happy and I love reading all of your comments and messages.